Ja Ja's

Drew is talking, talking, talking....maybe not as much as Ian...but he's certainly trying. Most things are clear, complete sentences. But, we have the occasional "what did he say?" moments. Tonight was one of those moments. He was standing on my lap and said "take my ja-ja's off mommy." That was a new one for me. I said "what Drew?" Frustrated he said "I do it. I take my ja ja's off". And...he proceeded to take his pajamas off. :)

This is OUR TRUTH

I missed the big Adoption Blogger day yesterday. But, that doesn't mean that I'm going to let a little thing like that stop me from posting today. Most of you have heard the story of the little boy adopted from Russia who was sent back to Russia by the woman who adopted him. I won't call her his mother...because, frankly, I don't think she deserves to be called that. That story is what has prompted adoptive families from all over the country to tell OUR TRUTH.


Our story began like so many other families....infertility. We tried to have biological children when we were newly married and for several years after...but that wasn't in the cards for us. We briefly talked about adoption, but never a serious conversation. We went on with our lives. Relocated to Tulsa, OK from Huntington, WV in 1996. We were both still heavily involved with the US Jaycees and I, in particular, had convinced myself that the desire for children was gone. Who in the world was I kidding? When people asked us if we were ever going to have children we'd say..."nah...we're too set in our ways to have a kid". All the while, secretly wanting a child of our own.


In 2003, we met a wonderful couple, the Gilmartins. They were in the process of adopting a little girl from China. We were so thrilled for them when they received Molly Mei's referral and couldn't wait for them to bring her home. Still, the words were never spoken between Charlie and I...the longing for a child just continued to grow. In January 2004 we went to Molly's first birthday party. She was such a beautiful little girl and we were just mesmerized by her and the whole process that Steph and Paul had experienced. We watched the video of her Gotcha Day in China...I think I cried through most of it. Soon after the video ended, Charlie said it was time to go. As we were walking to the car, he put his arm around me and said "we need to do this." I thought I was going to pass out. He didn't have to say it twice...I was on it.


I started researching agencies, requesting information, obsessing about becoming an adoptive family. I was in heaven. I won't bore you with all of the details through this part...but we ended up with a wonderful, reputable, Christian adoption agency...Dillon International (literally 5 miles from our home).


We waited 11 AGONIZING months for Ian's referral. It was awful. But, on September 7, 2005, when I got back from lunch I had a voice mail from Tami at Dillon. They had a referral of a little boy and wanted to know if we wanted to take a look. It was not the warm fuzzy feeling we had imagined though. Ian had some medical issues that we needed to consider. But...once we worked through that we KNEW he was our son. Five months later that sweet baby was placed in our arms FOREVER. He's not a perfect child by any means...but he's OUR child. As you can tell by my previous blog posts....he warms our heart and our home.

In 2007, we decided that our family was not complete and we started our second adoption. This time from Vietnam. It took us a little longer to get our paperwork completed for the second adoption, but we went on the waiting list and 5 days later....on October 5, 2007 we got "the call". Well... Charlie got the call. We rushed to the Dillon office and 15 minutes later looked at the picture of our newest baby boy. This tiny, tiny baby was in a orphanage half way around the world but we KNEW that he, too, was our son. We were so excited because he was only a little over 2 months old. The families who had traveled recently had only been waiting about 3-4 months from referral to travel date. I was so excited....we were going to get him home while he was still a small baby. With International adoption nothing is ever certain...and timelines...as our agencies tell us...are simply estimates. What we thought was going to be a short wait ended up being almost 11 months. But....we traveled when God had planned for us to travel. We left the day before my birthday in 2008 and on July 29, 2008 we held our Drew for the first time. Two days later he legally became our son FOREVER.


These boys are from different places, different biological parents and different cultures...but they are OUR BOYS. We could not love them, worry about them, hurt for them, cheer for them or treasure them any more than we do. There is NO doubt....NONE....that they are OURS. I could not imagine our lives without them. There are days when they drive us crazy. But at the end of the day....they call us mommy and daddy and that makes it all worth it.






These are the referral pictures of our sweet little guys. God is so good....ALL THE TIME! That my friends is OUR TRUTH.

That's What I Like About You

If I were blog savy, I'd find the song and imbed it in this post...but...I'm not.



I've been thinking a lot about my boys lately. How can I not think about them...they're all over me all most every minute I'm home. Not that I'm complaining though. So, I thought I would come up with my current "Like" list for each of them. One day...I'll come up with my "Dislike" list (hopefully that one's not very long). So...here we go....



The things I like about Ian Everett Kushal Conner:

-Sweet smile
-Beautiful eyes
-hugs
-the way his little mind thinks and processes information...so inquisitive.
-they way he loves me...unconditionally
-his impatient nature (that will also go on the dislike list)
-his love for Jesus
-the songs...the guitar playing
-his dances
-the way he runs
-his sense of humor
-the way he protects his little brother
-his thumb sucking (when he's sleepy)
-the way he waves good bye to me in the morning and says "have a good day mommy"
-his desire to learn about India
-his love for his daddy
-the kisses...the sweet, sweet kisses



The things I like about Drew Austin Quang Conner:

-that sweet little dimple on his left cheek
-the way he loves his blanket
-when he says "I lob mommy, I lob daddy, I lob bubba....I lob eeerbody"
-his "I kiss mommy" times....many times during the evening
-the way he sticks his little feet up and says "pee...yew...tinky feet"
-the thousand times a day he says "wats that" (also making it to the dislike list)
-his version of Itsy Bitsy Spider
-the way his little eyes just dance when he smiles
-the way he runs to me when I get home and squeals "mommy, mommy, mommy"
-his adorable jumping...both on the ground and on the bed
-the new phrase..."I do it"
-when he says his full name when he's asked his name
-his desire to learn all things that his bubba knows

There are so many things I love about my boys....both of them....these are just a few. Hopefully I'll figure out how to download pictures in a day or two. We have a new computer and my camera software is not working...or it could just be operator error :)

Where Did My Baby Go?

In a mere 6 days, my baby will be FIVE...yes FIVE years old. I can't believe it. It really only seems like yesterday that we were coming home from India with this precious little guy. These are his birthday pictures. He's looking way too grown up. He's so excited to be turning 5. He thinks he'll be a grown up with he hits that 5 year old mark. He's sure that his tooth is loose...but it's not. He told me last week that he needed braces...how in the world does he even know what braces are or what they're for? At least 3 times a day, when he's frustrated or mad at me, he tells me "you can't come to my birthday party". :) He is a smooth mess I tell you...a mess. But, he's my little mess and I love him so.

We're Still Here

It's been way too long since my last post. Sorry :(

I went home to West Virginia for a few days to attend my aunt's funeral. It was a sad occasion, but I was so happy to get to spend some time with my family. I missed all three of my boys like crazy though. It was nice to get home and hug on them for a little while.

January and the beginning of February brought the sick monster to our house. All of us have been sick at one time or another. Thankfully...we're all healthy right now. Little Drew had the hardest time of all. He even made his first trip to the ER. What a trooper though.

We're getting ready to celebrate Gotcha Day #4 on Wednesday. It's hard to believe that 4 years ago we were in India. Time truly does fly once these little guys come home. The waiting to get them....well, all of my adoptive parent friends know....it's just brutal.

Ian still amazes us almost daily with his vocabulary and perceptiveness. He's at a really fun and frustrating age. While I love watching his little mind grow and develop...I don't love how the mouth develops right along with it. I must tell him a dozen times a day "watch your mouth Ian". Kids can pick up some really bad habits from their peers at school. They also pick up on what we say as well. I have really had to clean up my mouth :) He's very excited about his birthday that's coming up in March. He asked me a couple of months ago if he'd be a grown up when he turned 5? :)

Drew's little vocabulary is growing, growing, growing. He knows all of his colors and shapes and can count to 12 without help. He gets a little messed up after that. He LOVES his mommy....I mean he really LOVES me. He just can't stop smiling when I come home from work. He gets so excited. That warms a mommy's heart. He also adores his "bubba". He and Ian are constantly rough housing. Daddy is usually in the middle of the crowd and Drew (and Ian) think he's pretty darn cool.

I promise...I'll post some of our Gotcha Day happenings and possibly pictures. We're going to take Ian out of school half a day on Wednesday to celebrate. We told him he could pick a nice restaurant to go to for lunch that day. What did he pick? Wendy's. I said "no, Ian...a nice restaurant." He looked at me and said "OK...how about McDonald's?"

Almost Heaven...West Virginia

While the reason that I'm heading home for a few days makes me so very sad, I'm looking forward to seeing my family and friends.

I received a call today about 11:30am (CST) that my aunt passed away. She had been literally hanging on by a thread for a very long time. Her frail little body had done all it could do and now she's resting in the arms of her saviour. What a glorious reunion I'm sure she's having in Heaven. Seeing her sisters, her only brothers, aunts, uncles, cousins and her mom and dad. My aunt, Vada, was such a sweet, sweet woman. I honesty don't think she had a mean bone in her body. I have been part of their family since I was 7 years old and I can't ever remember her saying a mean or hateful thing about anyone.

Crafty...that's another way I remember Vada. She loved to quilt, crochet, cross stitch and sew. She had a real talent for sewing.

She never married, which is a shame. She had so much love to give. I always thought that she'd be the perfect grandmother.

Rest in peace dear Vada....another of God's good soldiers has gone home.

The Sweet Innocence of a Child

Children are so innocent. Many times when we're in the throws of parentng it's hard to remember just how innocent and sweet our children can be. Tonight was a big reminder for me.

My aunt, back in West Virginia, is very sick and probably dying. After I got off the phone with her care giver this evening. Ian had lots of questions. He's a very perceptive little boy. I explained to him that Vada is very, very sick. He asked "what happened to her?" I said "well, she has a bad heart." He quickly replied "I'll share my heart with her mommy, ok?" I had a huge lump in my throat and tears in my eyes. Such a sweet, innocent little guy. I love my Ian.

Thank you God for reminding me just how special this child is...every day....every way.

Christmas 2009

Christmas 2009 is in the books. What a wonderful season it's been. We had a great Christmas. Although, for the first time ever, Tulsa had a blizzard warning on Christmas Eve. We had lots of snow and lots of blowing snow. Lots of sleet, rain and ice. Christmas Eve was pretty miserable outside, but inside we were snug as a bug. We had lots of fun making cookie for Santa and getting ready for Santa's visit. Our church services, like most of Tulsa churches, were canceled. This was really strange for us. We LOVE our Christmas Eve candlelight service. The boys went to bed around 8:30pm. Ian was a little concerned that Santa might take our plate that the cookies were on, but I reassured him that Santa would leave the plate and just eat the cookies.

Ian woke up at 5am, but I convinced him that he needed to stay in bed a little while longer. So, at 6:15am he had all he could handle. He was ready to get up and nothing was stopping him. We woke Drew up (which is not a fun thing to do) and headed to the living room to see if Santa had stopped by. Then the madness ensued. Drew had a great time this year and Ian always enjoys Christmas. Ian had asked Santa for a guitar and he was thrilled to see that Santa had listened. He also got a big boy bike....and he was SO excited. Of course, with 8 inches of snow outside, he had to ride it in the kitchen (for now). After all of the presents were opened...they played and played with their new stuff. Ian serenaded us several times with his guitar. Drew even got in on the action.

After lunch and a nap, we headed outside to play in the snow. Ian is fearless and just jumped right in. Drew is not so brave. He played for a few minutes and then said "I keared" (I'm scared). So I took him back inside. Ian played outside with Charlie for a while longer.

We are so blessed. We had a great Christmas. After all of the festivities and presents and mayhem....we still remember the real reason for Christmas. "For unto us a child is born"....that child would be our Saviour and King. I pray that your holiday season was filled with lots of fun, family, friends and love. Enjoy the pictures of the Conner Christmas!

Merry Cricket

It's hard to believe that it's almost Christmas. Where has the year gone? We've been busy throughout the season, but not so much that we haven't had time to enjoy it. Thankfully, we've all been well.

Ian continues to just be a rowdy, inquisitive 4 year old. He still asks tons of questions and talks ALL the time. He's having lots of fun at school, especially with his friends Sazel (just like Hazel, but with a S) and Ian H. We hear about them everyday. Yesterday he kept saying a new word..."ridicnified"....a combination of ridiculous and dignified. When I asked Ian what the word means he said "it's something important Mommy". Who knows. He's looking forward to Christmas this year. He hasn't asked for much, only little toy bicycle that he saw in a Target flyer about 2 months ago. The new favorite movie in our house is The Polar Express. Both boys love it, but Ian especially does. He has had 2 Christmas programs...one at Church and one at School. He didn't sing during the "Quids Choir" (aka Kids Choir) performance at church. He sat down and played with his motorcycle. Note to self...no toys in church. For his school performance, he did very well. He sang and did most of the hand motions. We visited Rhema to see the Christmas lights on Friday night and took the opportunity to visit Santa while we were there. Ian of course had to ask him where his sleigh was.

Drew is growing up way too fast. With the second child, I find myself wanting him to stay a baby just a little while longer. He's talking more and more (when he gets a chance). His favorite questions are "what color" and "why". He'll ask "what color" and then tell us himself. He has been so much fun this Christmas season. He LOVES the "Cricket Tree" (Christmas tree) and the "Cricket" lights. When he sees the lights he'll yell "I see nother one". The first time he did this, the boys and I were in the car coming home from parents night out at church. Every time we passed Christmas lights, that's what I heard. It was so much fun. When we went to Rhema this past Friday evening, his little mouth was open and he looked around and of course said "I see nother one". He wasn't so sure about Santa, but he didn't cry this year. He had fun at Ian's Christmas program at school. Of course while the principal was praying to open the program, I guess Drew thought the prayer was a little too long....about mid way through....with quiet all around us...Drew said "Amen". Christmas morning is going to be so much fun for him this year.

Charlie and I are doing well. We both have jobs and in this economy, that's something to be thankful for. I'm off work all week this week and I'm so looking forward to it. I'm hoping to do a little baking and get all of the presents wrapped before Thursday. Charlie has to work Christmas Eve (overnight shift). I'm praying I can keep Ian in bed until Charlie get home at 8am.

We are so blessed to have our two boys....they bring so much joy to our lives. Watching them begin to understand the real Christmas story is so touching. Merry Christmas everyone.

November 15th....Hmmm....

Is it too early to put the Christmas tree up? Again...I'm so very excited about the holiday season. Ian is getting excited too. He asked me yesterday if we were going to be able to put the Christmas tree in the living room since there's so much stuff in the floor? Hmmmmm....good question. So my response was....well, if you don't put your toys away we might not get to put the tree up. As of this moment...toys are still all over the floor. :(

This morning, we were blessed to have Tony Campolo speak at our church. What an amazing speaker...preacher. He was inspiring and challenging. If you ever get the chance to see him in person, do it...you will be touched, blessed, and motivated. I've been thinking about this for a while, but now I'm serious....I'm going to go on my first mission trip in 2010. I'm not sure where yet. Wherever God wants me to go. We have several opportunities coming up. I need to be in prayer about this and I need for you, my friends, to join me. I need to GO. I need to follow what God is telling my heart and GO!

The second part of this post doesn't seem to match the first part....but that's my world. Things don't always match up.